Not to beat a dead horse, but I hear that some Platte County-ites are getting on the Excuse Train about the old 2001 Melvin Douglas Invite, in which The Hat beat the #13 or #14 team in the nation. Granted, PC won the recent SMS tourney...but Kansas is still tops.

Now, this post is not to brag on the Hat and it's not to belittle Platte County. It's purpose is to make funny jokes and prove once and for all that Kansas is the best wrestling state in the world. (Actually, since Kansas is the greatest state in the world, the title of "Best Wrestling State" is already implied.)

So here's how I remember that tournament: We were pretty pumped, because we had a freaking sweet team and we wanted to see the mythical Platte County, who had won like, 55 state championships in a row. Granted, they're a small school, but they were nationally ranked. (And we were ranked 2nd in 6A.) Plus, with PC there, it made the tournament a little more exciting, since it's usually a pretty easy tournament.

First and foremost, everyone was terrified of Chase Verdorn. He was enormous. He was the spitting image of Ivan Drago, of Rocky IV fame. They had some tiny guy who was awesome too, but...eh. Verdorn was scary. Everyone was impressed.

As for little Prant, he was 16 and wrestling in his first ever varsity tournament. (Little Prant missed Leavenworth due to the fact that he was violin-ing away the week before.) Naturally, Prant was un-terrified of Vase Cherdorn. Everyone in the gym knew that the Melvin Douglas Invite would come down to two battles: Manhattan vs. Platte County, and Prant vs. Vase.

Well, my friends, neither turned out to be the Battle Royale that was promised. Hat Town had like, 12 in the finals (though we ended up losing a bunch...Coach was mad.) and ended up winning the tournament by like, 60-80 points. Of course, with the team title locked up, everyone would normally leave. However...the Prant/Vase matchup was too delicious to miss, so everyone stayed around.

Prant and Vase did not disappoint. Vase took off his warmups to reveal a sculpted, V-shaped chest and telephone pole legs. (Unfortunately, he also had some pretty girly tattoos.) To answer the Missourian's show of might, Prant took off his warmups to reveal a saggy chest, complete with udders and lots of extra skin. No one was impressed.

That would soon change, however. The epic first period began with a Cherdorn takedown, and the crowd knew they were in for a clash of the titans. After battling mightily, Prant managed to go out of bounds on two occassions, and the stage was set:

Prant returned to the center mat. The ref grabbed his whistle, placed it in his mouth, and just like that, it happened. The whistle blew, and Prant exploded with the power of a million Space Shuttles. Cherdorn was taken aback by this show of force, and had no idea what to do. And soon--it was over.

Prant had caused blood time. He had cut The Russian. The crowd went wild. Victory and babes ensued.

Oh, and Hat Town owned Platte County in the tournament. I know they were missing a state champ or two, but it would have made no difference. Oh-- and we got 2nd in state that year. (I believe Platte County won state, and Vase went on to finish 2nd in the country, beating 2X state champ Josh Carrol in the process.) This just proves my point that Kansas rules, Missouri drools.

Ad Astra Per Aspera, baby.