Kansas Wrestling
Posted By: nix feeling guilty - 03/26/08 01:15 AM
was just wondering for those who have more than 1 kid, have you had any experience with this.

my 7 year old daughter ask me . dad since wrestling season is over would you help me with dance. i said sissy bear mom's help daughter's with dance, she then informed me that i spent all my time with jeffrey.

looking back, she would be right. after school, me and jeffrey would start wrestling, then on the other days he had practice.
then we would run, well he would run i was merly a bystander.
but now after she made those comment's, i told her i would take her to topeka with me to watch state.

she had the nerve to say dad somthing fun, can you believe that.lol. i then informed her sissy we did spend time on the weekends at tournaments, she said thats not the same. so now i really am feeling guilty. so i am planning on a trip just her and me, maybe i can still talk her into state.
better not it will be fun for her, has any one else ever felt guilty as well.
Posted By: bockman Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 01:29 AM
nix i have 5 kids. my oldest daughter is 11. she started playing basketball when she was 5. she is really good. she wants to play all year but i give her a little time off. this last winter season since wrestling has started i watched her play. something is missing. i feel like i havent been there to push her like i used to. i really dont know if this is good or bad. the good is me not being there and her getting mad at me when i try to fix something and the bad me thinking she isnt playing hard like she used to. its kinda the same but she told me she doesnt want to play softball this summer cause she wants to go fishing with me. now my 9 year old daughter is signed up to play soccer and softball and says she wants to go fishing and not play softball. we went out and bought my son a baseball bat the other day for 100.00 and my daughters both said dad i never got a hundred dollar bat. i said nope you got 50.00 pair of shoes for soccer and basketball. its all kind of fun but makes me think in the long run. i still have 2 more ages 5 and 3 that i havent even started with. man maybe we all need to take a year off and just go fishing and hunting.
Posted By: Travis Phippen Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 01:30 AM
Nix,

How's this for guilt. My daughter has gymnastics state this weekend and my son is wrestling as well. My daughter said well you have made all of Cody's tournaments can you make it to mine for state. I feel guilty, but hope that state gets out early enough on Sunday to watch her as well.
Posted By: MIGHTY'SMOM Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 01:35 AM
Nix, I thought you wrote your "finale"! LOL Glad you didn't, but you better watch out, someone might be counting your posts!
I have 5 kids. The oldest is 25, the youngest is 11. We have always been an active family. My kids have been involved in just about every sport there is (if any DARES tell my son the hockey exists...) Everyone got dragged to everyone elses activity. My poor son has probably attended more dance and gymnastics performances than anyone in this state! And his sisters have been to more wrestling tournaments than they want to be at, but they go! I always tried to have a "date" night with each child a few times during the year. We would go to dinner then a movie. It gives you the alone time to talk and it is something they never forget. I still do this with all my kids, even though 3 of them don't live at home anymore. Friday, I am going to dinner and a movie with one of my daughters to celebrate her 21st birthday. Tonight, I babysat my grandson while my oldest took her daughter to dinner, then to see "Horton Hears a Who".
Their father could never be bothered attending anything they did. He really didn't get to know his own children very well. So now that he's gone, he can't understand why they don't answer their cells when he calls, or why they don't call him. Don't let that happen to you. Spend the time with them when they are little, when they are older they will remember.
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:04 AM
it' was supposed to be my finale, lol but i am having alot of down time this week, so i figured if i am only on at nite that will work for this week.

plus i pick a bad week to put my finale on here, because i am real intersted , on seeing how all of your kids do this weekend, and i am rotten for all of them to do well.

travis hope you get out early as well and get to watch your daughter.

and mightysmom, i will not mention hockey.

as for huntin bockman, pheasant season in western kansas is some of the best, i will invite you and your kids, and any one else that may want to come for a great opening day or later in the season with a garantee you will limit out. i can't wait because my daughter loves to hunt with me, my son as well it's always quality time well spent.
Posted By: bockman Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:12 AM
my daughters say they will not go hunting with me for pheasants cause they do not want to be my bird dog. lol. they still have to go through hunter saftey. I would love to come out and go pheasant hunting. i only got to go 2 times this year and shot 2 birds. the year before i finally got to go to south dakota. shot 7 birds in one field. so i will take you up on that hunt one of these days. especially when my kids are able to carry a gun on the hunt.
Posted By: Allie Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:21 AM
Nix-
A little guilt is a good thing. It keeps things in check. I have 5 kids - one's married, 2 kids and a life of his own. My two daughter's love going to their littlest brother's wrestling tournaments - they won't miss them. My middle (step)son is big into horses and during the summer competes at a horse show every weekend. I love horses too - there are 5 hay burners outside my back door right now- but I hate waiting all day and most of the night to watch him ride. (My husband feels the same way about wrestling). Daughters are ruthless creatures (LOL) they will guilt you into lots of things. After state, spend a little one on one time with her - that's what she really wants.
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:25 AM
can you believe between just the 5 of us who have posted on this topic we have 19 kids all togather, forget about a baseball team lost my train of thought don't know what we could start with that many kids.
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:30 AM
i am going to spend some quality time with just me and her, but then jeffrey will get upset i guess it will always be a no win situation. and i did it again tonite, got off work walked in the house and asked jeffrey if he wanted to throw the football.

if i could kick myself in the mouth i would have no teeth left.
one day i will get this parent thing under control, i hope. still learning.
Posted By: Benelli Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:34 AM
So far in our first year, my two older daughters have enjoyed watching my two boys wrestle this year, haven't had the guilt thing YET.

Nix, that means add 4 more to your count!
And BTW you better watch how many time you post in this thread......
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:38 AM
23 between six people, well i guess 12 people. sry about the posts kids are in bed. and i am awake, so they will just have to deal with me tonite lol.
Posted By: Pelland Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:43 AM
Add three more...

My daughter will turn 7 next month, and she asked me if I would coach her softball team this year.

This time of year I do spend more time with my oldest, but I do feel like I spend time with my daughter as well. I just wonder how she see's it, or how she feels. I think I will ask her tomorrow after school.

I'm glad you started this post Nix...pretty good stuff.

Thanks for commenting Allie, you brought up some good points.
Posted By: Benelli Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:45 AM
Just giving you a hard time, I read everyday, but don't post all that often.
Enjoy reading your posts, are you really going to retire from here?? LOL.
Posted By: Allie Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 03:09 AM
You need to introduce your daughter to some of the little boy wrestlers (how old is she?) My daughters are teenagers and love teasing all the little guys (8 and under). I didn't mention that I "get" to coach my son's baseball team - which I gave up after 3 years of it - because I think the boys need a male coach - but none of the Dad's want to do it!! I include my daughter's in crowd control - again, they love teasing this little guys. Other son tolerates it as long as he has a big bag of sunflower seeds and the promise of a raceo on the weekend.
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 03:14 AM
i know you are benalli. and yes retirment is coming up soon. lol it's kinda like the boy who cried wolf, i also enjoy reading your replies as well as all the others.
Posted By: bockman Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 03:59 AM
keep those boys away from my daughters. i will have to show them my shiny 12 guage if they come near lol. ok i would send them to sister school.
Posted By: C C Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 11:08 AM
Phippen,
I would like to help you guys get out early on Sunday, but it is doubtful. If he knows any of your stuff, then you'll be there til the end.

Allie,
You are in luck; they have that horse thing going on at the Expocentre this weekend too.

Benelli,
I recommend a Browning Gold Hunter. A lot less kick (and barrel lift) and the best safety button hands down.

Mighty's Mom,
There's nothing wrong with having your son going to dance.

Bockman,
Get your daughters some fishing poles along with the guns.

We all need to spend less time on wrestling. But, I agree that it's tough to do when there are tournaments available from Nov through March, and nobody wants to get behind. But, the keys to being a great HS wrestler are learning the 7 basic moves and being able to execute a technique system on the mat. You don't need 40 matches a year for that when you're 8. I know a guy that started wrestling for the first time in HS, and then became a state champ and All-American. I also know a 5-time KS kids state champ who didn't even wrestle in HS.

Cokeley for president!
 Originally Posted By: Cokeley
This is where we have to get outside of the box. We could shorten the season and state would consist of only 8U, 10U, and 12U wrapping up before high school state. Then we could have 14U and 16U after HS state to accomodate HS and MS wrestlers. If we did this the tournament could move from district to district. (Pittsburg, Wichita, Topeka, Hays, Manhattan, Salina).


_________________________
Larry: Excuse me, but what the &*$& is going on out here?
Crash Davis: Well, Nuke's scared because his eyelids are jammed and his old man's here. We need a live ... is it a live rooster? ... We need a live rooster to take the curse off Jose's glove and nobody seems to know what to get Millie or Jimmy for their wedding present ... Is that about right? ... We're dealing with a lot of *&%#.
Larry: Okay, well, uh... candlesticks always make a nice gift, and uh, maybe you could find out where she's registered and maybe a place-setting or maybe a silverware pattern. Okay, let's get two! Go get 'em.
Posted By: Coach Bill Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 12:27 PM
nix,

I also have 5 kids,oldest daughter is 20 in college and working, my son who wrestles is 12, my twin girls are 10 and my youngest daughter is 3. My twins are the ones I here it from, so I believe I have it worse, I have to here it in stereo lol. Even though I do coach them in our fall soccer league I still here how much time I spend with my son. I do feel guilty and wish I could spend more time with them in the winter and early spring.
Oh and dont get me started on the suround sound when my wife starts in.
I have told my kids we are going to do alot more fishing this spring and summer, and am hoping to get my twins hunter safety course done also. so whoever is going hunting count me and kids in lol.
this is a great post that I believe alot of parents are dealing with.
Oh I almost forgot, get this, my oldest daughter was at districts and called me on my phone while I was coaching, and asked me if I was going to come out and see her new car, I told her I was kind of busy at the moment and would have to see it later and she hung up on me and hasn't answered my calls or texts since, so it doesn't stop at 20 yrs. old either!!!
Posted By: PatrickCavanaugh Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 12:58 PM
Nix, my son who wrestles is 10, he has a 6 year old brother & a 15 year old sister. My 6 year old is not interested in wrestling (yet) & my 15 year old has made poor decisions & has been housed in wakeeney kansas since January. Both of my kids that do not wrestle are jealous of the time I spend with the 10 year old & yet my 10 year old is jealous of the time I try to spend with his siblings away from wrestling. I try to take my 6 year old to practice, he goes from time to time but often finds it boring & would rather stay home with Mom. I give him lots of attention when at home, but this time of year it is not very often as we are hitting every practice that we can. Now, heres the kicker, my 15 year old's birthday is 3/30, she is turning 16 & get's her first pass home since January this weekend. Where will we all weekend including her birthday???? Yep, at the expo centre at the tournament. She is actually excited to get out of her current situation & knows what the schedule is, but yeah I feel you as far as the guilt goes. Not sure there is an easy fix. It's a long season, but I am glad the off season is longer so I can attempt to mend fences with the rest of the family!
Posted By: Indydad40 Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 01:18 PM
Well add 4 more to our team Nix, I had two son's one 9 and one 7 in wrestling this season. The 7 yr old got the burn out and stoped wrestling about 1 toury before sub districts and now he's talking the B word next year. The 9 yr old is going to state this weekend and i have promised the two girls left at home most of the time 5 and 3 that i will have more time for them after this weekend. They both have been talking about wanting me to take them fishing i keep saying its to cold or coming up with some sort of excuse. We all have to juggle our busy schedules around our Children. I am one that is also feeling the pressure from younger siblings and the guilt of not spending enough quality time with everyone else. But i guess after this weekend there is baseball x2 boys and softball for 1 girl here we go again.

Todd
Posted By: up4wrestling Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:06 PM
Our house hold is made up of 2 boys 11 and 15 both will be wrestling at State this weekend...and our 13yr old (going on 21) daughter. My husband coaches wrestling and we spend on average 3 nights a week at it along with the weekends starting last December. Last week our kids were on spring break and our daughter was trying to arrange to go bowling with friends..one who wrestles..and as she would ask about a date...no, practice, no,set up for districts, no weigh ins, no Districts..I admit to feeling guilty. We did manage to fit a 3hr bowling afternoon into the week!
My husband also coaches JR Wrestling and as our daughter was a 7th grader this year she played Basketball at the same time....she was quite upset that Dad was not attending her games due to JR high practices and duals....he took off 2 practices and missed one dual to help keep her happy. She said she might as well quit BB and wrestle so her dad would be around to watch her. She is quite tall and a great BB player...and she has tried wrestling (actually won a few!) but she's too cute to wrestle with boys her age! Atleast in our opinion!! Remember...her dad coaches Jr high boys... In the past few years my daughter and I would travel to her MYOB tourneys...while my husband and the boys wrestled. We kept updated by phone thru out the weekends...She is involved in a dance class and we reserve a weekend in June for her performances...just for her and the boys attend both nights. Both of us have coached her Softball teams and soccer teams in the past... It takes work to keep a household of 3 happy...and as you know with teens they are never happy for too long at a time!
I like the night out with each child...that's a great idea!

Good luck this weekend....the daughter is already trying to figure out how to be elsewhere!!!
Posted By: schroedermom Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 02:23 PM
I have 3 boys - 9, 7 and 1. I guess I would say that I have some guilt because we haul our 1-year-old all over the place just about every weekend for his older brothers wrestling. It is not fair to him, having to be tied down and unable to move around much for an entire weekend! He is just getting up walking pretty good so not being able to move around much gets to him at times.

I also look at it as family time and that helps me not feel so guilty. I guess in a few more weeks my 1 year old will get to be outside at baseball practices (then football practices) and he will like that a ton! He just needs to survive 2 more weeks . . . and then he will have a break until November!!
Posted By: Jointboys Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 04:37 PM
I have two boys Gary and Wayne and what makes me feel guilty is when both of them are wrestling at the same time different mats which has happened alot this year.
Posted By: C C Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 04:49 PM
Sometimes I think it may be better to just sit out from competition every other year, and pay the head HS coach $6000 for private lessons for 2 workout partners. Everybody would be ahead, including other siblings. I just don't know if anybody would provide private lessons 3 times a week for a few months for $6000.
Posted By: Dean Welsh Re: feeling guilty - 03/26/08 10:21 PM
 Originally Posted By: nix
i am going to spend some quality time with just me and her, but then jeffrey will get upset i guess it will always be a no win situation. and i did it again tonite, got off work walked in the house and asked jeffrey if he wanted to throw the football.

if i could kick myself in the mouth i would have no teeth left.
one day i will get this parent thing under control, i hope. still learning.


The wise ALWAYS learn until the day they die. The fool says "I got this ALL FIGURED OUT..." So, since you are 'still learning' - my guess is that you are doing just as fine as the rest of us. Parenting is hard. No one ever said it was easy. If they did, they are either clueless or a liar.

Strive for balance. Know sometimes you will fail. Sometimes miserable (at least I do). But, what is your goal? "Cats in the Craddle" is always a good one to help me get my priorities back in the right mode.

Role model and practice love, kindness, patience and forgiveness and you'll be just fine! No one can please all the people all the time . . . Just remember, what are YOUR goals and how are YOU doing on them?

Dean, father of three little girls -- 5, 3 and 1 -- but don't let that fool you -- I'm old. 43. I started late.

However, I have taught elementary PE for 19 years so I do know a few things about kids.
Posted By: nix Re: feeling guilty - 03/27/08 12:30 AM
thanks for all the input, as far as how many has posted and the number of kids tally i have lost count, i was up to 23, maybe if i have time i will research total people diffrent people who have posted and tally the kids. or some one who can count and read faster can make the tally. lol i assume we have enough to make an nfl team.

or can some one answer this because i do not know. what sport would have the most players on it, including backups and so on.
Posted By: kswrestlermom Re: feeling guilty - 03/27/08 01:33 AM
Well I guess I am the lucky one. I have 3 kids. Son-12 Daughter-10 Daughter-8 and all three have wrestled. The youngest one decided to sit out this year but loves to go to practices and tournaments. As a mom who does it all on her own, I feel very lucky and fortunate that all of my kids love to wrestle and I get to spend alot of quality time with them day in and day out. I feel for each of you that have to deal with the guilt of one or more of your children feeling left out. Reading your posts have reminded me just how lucky and fortunate I truly am. And as soon as the next two weekends are over we will be digging out the fishing poles also. As for the hunting, well....not gonna happen. LOL I am just not that good of a shot and thankfully my kids don't ask to go. Good Luck to all.
Jenna
Posted By: NColtrane Re: feeling guilty - 03/27/08 03:16 PM
Add three more to this list. My 9year old boy and 5 year old girl both wrestle, and she also has dance one day a week instead of wrestling. The one left out is mom, who stays home with our 9 month old. She loves watching both kids, but hates wrestling the baby and the older two on the sidelines while I coach. Hoping a toddler may help next year, but I doubt it. So I have to promise Mom to spend some time with her after the season. The kids are easy, at least at this age.
Posted By: 2bentleymom Re: feeling guilty - 03/27/08 03:47 PM
I have 4 kids and I have to say I feel guilty everyday in one way or another..My oldest is 10 and she is from a relationship before my husband and I and she loves to play basketball and well I dont get into basketball and I felt really guilty this year because my mom took her to practice so I could be at wrestling practice with my other 2 and then on game days it was saturdays well I missed all but 1 due to wrestling tournaments and I only made that one because there was no tournament that day..I am dreading them getting older cause they are in the same season but hopefully by then my son can not need mom as much mat side..Juggling time between kids is hard I am glad the one that dont play sports yet is my baby and is only 4 so we have time while the others are in school..My oldest has a little Boyfriend on the wrestling team so it makes it easier now she wants to go..lol..
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